Signals of Stress

You may be under too much stress if you…

…find yourself irritable or impatient with things you normally tolerate.

…have difficulty getting to sleep and feel exhausted when you awake.

…sense you are one step away from falling apart.

…suffer from frequent headaches or stomach pains.

…get distracted easily and have trouble concentrating.

…talk more negatively then usual.

…become forgetful and absentminded.

…don’t laugh as much as you used to.

…use alcohol, non-prescription drugs, or food to help you relax.

…postpone what is truly important, to accomplish what isn’t that important.

Carol Clifton,PH.D.

Licensed phychologist

2010 "Mind Dump" and 2011 "Ramp Up"

Today is the last day of being 38 years old and I really don’t know what to think about it. There is absolutely nothing I can do about it. I know I’m getting close to 40 and I don’t know why I dread it so much. In my mind it is "middle-aged" and I also consider myself younger. After my yearly physical on Monday and my birthday tomorrow, it reminds me I’m getting older. I’m very much retrospective this week. This year did not start that great for me with my sister-n-law being diagnosed with cancer, having horrible back pain and eventually surgery and a family friend's father slowly passing away. But the year had a great turn-around and finished on a positive note. My wife and I bought a house that we love in a neighbor we love. My wife’s sister got married to an awesome guy, my sister-n-law is in remission, Rocky River Church (where I serve on staff) started building their first-ever building and there are some very positive changes taking place. I really love my life and what I do.

I have one more year left in my 30’s, but my 30’s have been great to me. I got married to my awesome bride, we bought 2 houses and my son was born 3 ½ years ago. I’ve changed careers 3 times: left the ministry to work for Kinko’s, Staples and OfficeMax; left that career to work in real estate; left real estate to do what I was called to do and started out doing ministry, working with people - not paper or property.

Over the last month I’ve been cleaning out and going through boxes that I have had for years. I am a borderline hoarder and don’t throw anything away, especially if it was a handwritten letter/card or had some meaning to me (just ask my wife). As I was cleaning things out I was reminded of some people who have spoken into my life over the years. Travis Baxter, whom I have known since the 7th grade and has been the best friend anyone could have asked for. He was very important for me becoming serious about my faith, my best man in my wedding and someone I talk to on a weekly basis. I love this guy and his family. Jay and Melanie Stewart, my pastors in the youth group and spoke so much into my life. We have not kept up much in the past couple of years but their impact in my life will never fade. Bruce Mulford- my great friend from college. I was his best man in his wedding. I miss Bruce because we have not talked in the past couple of years but he is the Godliest man and husband I know. I have always admired the love he has for God and for people. Jack and Sara Snavley- Sara is the closest thing I have to a sister, although I joke that she is old enough to be my mom. She was my right arm during the time I served in Ohio as a youth minister. She and Jack took me as one of their family when I didn't know anyone in Ohio. We speak several times a month and I visit her and Jack once a year. Although there are many people who have impacted my life, these people I remember the most. But none of these people have impacted my life as much as my wife has. I am so thankful I have Courtney to finish my life with.

Wow- I feel good now. I have dumped out the things I have been dwelling on for a while. Now I’m excited about ramping up for 2011. I am ready to finish my 30’s strong. Here are some things I want to accomplish/ ramp up/ goals for the last year of my 30’s and head into my 40’s with full steam. Here it is in list form:

1. Loose 40 pounds to be around my ideal weight. I want to fit into the skinning jeans all the hip, young people are wearing (not really, just kidding - really it's those acid washed jean I use to wear!)

2. I want to blog at least 52 times next year. That’s at least once a week but does not necessarily mean once a week, it may be twice a week.

3. I want to read one book a month. I already read a lot of blogs and magazines. I just want to increase my book reading.

4. I want to start my Master Degree in Leadership Management. This will depend on my financial situation.

5. I want to be in coaching a network for pastors who do what I do. This will depend on my financial situation.

Part of my reason for posting my goals is to make them real and accountable. I also added numbers to make them measurable.

I am going to make next year the best possible year I can make it. I hope you will do the same as well.

Happy New Year!

Words of Wisdom Through the Ages

I like blogging and recently I've not shared much from my personal life, but the things I do blog about are some of the things I read and chew on for a few days. I like sharing these thoughts through my blog because it allows me to share with others. Sometimes, I like sharing things that make me laugh. Below are some comments that make me think and laugh - my favorite stuff to read. These are comments from people in different stages of life.

Words of Wisdom Through the Ages:

I’ve learned that I like my teacher because she cries when we sing “Silent Night.” (Age 6)

I’ve learned that you can hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. (Age 7)

I’ve learned that if you want to cheer yourself up, you should try cheering someone else up. (Age 14)

I’ve learned that silent company is often more healing than words of advice. (Age 24)

I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it. (Age 39)

I’ve learned that the greater a person’s sense of guilt, the greater his need to cast blame on others. (Age 46)

I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a man by the way he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage and tangled Christmas tree lights. (Age 52)

I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you will miss them terribly after they die. (Age 53)

I’ve learned that if you want to do something positive for your children, try to improve your marriage. (Age 61)

I’ve learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But if you focus on your family, the needs of others, your work, meeting new people, and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you. (Age 65)

I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with kindness, I usually make the right decision. (Age 66)

I’ve learned that everyone can use a prayer. (Age 72)

I’ve learned that whenever I have pains, that I don’t have to be one. (Age 82)

I’ve learned that everyday you should reach out and touch someone. People love human touch - holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. (Age 85)

I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn. (Age 92)

God is listening

When a man or woman of God fails, nothing of God fails. When a man or woman of God changes, nothing of God changes. When someone dies, nothing of God dies. When our lives are altered by the unexpected, nothing of God is altered or unexpected.

In the book of Isaiah (in the Old Testament of the Bible) chapter 65 verse 24, it states: “Before they call, I will answer; and while they are yet speaking I will hear.” Before you even utter a word, God promises, “I’m involved in answering. In fact while you’re speaking, I’m involved in bringing to pass the very thing I have planned from the get go (My paraphrase).”

Faith

Before God ever flung the stars into place, God had today in mind. He had this very week in mind. In fact, He had you in mind. And He knew excatly what He was going to do. God is never at a loss to know what He’s going to do in our situations. He knows perfectly well what is best for us. Our problems is, we don’t know. And we say to Him, “Lord, if you tell just tell me, then I’ll be in great shape. Just reveal it to me. Explain Your plan to me, and I’ll count. Just reveal it to me. Explain Your plan to me, and I’ll count on You.” But that’s not faith. Faith is counting on Him when we do not know what tomorrow holds.

Charles R. Swindoll from the book: "David, A man of Passion and Destiny"

Destiny

Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become your actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch you’re your character; it becomes your destiny.

Frank Outlaw

How to Become a Lifelong Learner

1. START WITH YOUR ATTITUDE

Lifelong learning begins with a heart that desires changes, wisdom and application.

2. ASK QUESTIONS

Learners ask good questions. They possess an insatiable curiosity- a longing to know, discover, and inquire.

3. join Others

Collaborative learning- in classes, small groups, with friends and colleagues- allows us to benefit from diverse perspectives and approaches.

4. CHECK OUT THE OTHER SIDE.

Take time to examine and understand another point of view, even if it radically contradicts yours.

5. READ BROADLY

Include a diversity of books, authors, and topics.

6. KEEP A JOURNAL

Recording what we learn captures our growth in wisdom.

7. EXPERIMENT

Try new approaches and ideas. Age does not affect your ability to learn.

8. APPLY WHAT YOU KNOW

Out depth of understanding is often directly related to our ability to apply what we’ve learned. Application takes knowledge from the head to the heart.

Bill Mowry form Discipleship Journal